Telling Your Parents You're Pregnant Worse Than Being In Labor

It's official: I heart Bristol Palin! And not just as a punch line. In her first interview last night (on Fox, how predictable) Bristol had all sorts of gems, such as describing her new son as "very, very, very cute" and the above, a headline lifted from a quote. I'd like to remind the audience I'm not being sarcastic here.

Best of all, Bristol goes against that crazy-ass witch she has for a mother and says that she thinks abstinence teaching is just unrealistic and blames it on all the teenage pregnancy up in this piece (i.e. the U.S.)!

Of course, Sarah, desperately in withdrawal from lack of spotlight, crashes the interview and drags Bristol's 6-week-old son into it. But it doesn't work; because Brist is so much smarter and open-eyed than her mother, she's really the one you wanna see. And she's so pretty too!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY: I have a theory that 1981 was a powerhouse year for celebrity births. If you think of "celebrity" as it should be defined, this would mean that the year bred many successful artists and other creative types, right? Today, we have Joseph Gordon Levitt (10 Things I Hate About You!) and Paris Hilton, both turning 28.

You decide.